on even more unexpected pains.
remember the unexpected period last week? it lasted a whole 6 days and it’s still going. i’ve stopped bleeding but the symptoms have been sticking around. i had such a bad nausea episode yesterday i really am, at this point, tired of talking about it.
today (Monday) i woke up feeling like a train wreck, appetite still only at 30-40% despite feeling hungry (which means i’m hungry but i also can’t eat as much yet????), and still feeling that familiar sensation of a pinching cramp in my side from time to time.
i hate it here and i would like to sleep and not have any dreams and wake up in peace. please. it’s been so long.
on connecting vs. consuming art
more and more on a daily basis, i am wondering to myself if we’re connecting to art more than we are consuming it.
i love films. i love films mostly because we get to do both: we consume and digest the art while also connecting with it. we pay for Netflix and movies at the cinema to watch amazing stories, relate to characters, and become overly-invested (me) with the setup.
yet, from a writer’s and illustrator’s perspective, watching KL’s art market frequencies drive up every weekend seems like proof to me that there is a growing trend of people who want to discover and support local artists, but mostly at the expense of bringing home art pieces that connect with them. to me, this connection is short, shallow, and almost an introductory one. lots of people flock to art markets to buy things at a whim mostly because the “story” or “brand” being presented (forcefully? to fit in the market?) by artists is an overall aesthetic one.
whether you’re into cute cats, maximalism, tattoo art, there’s something that fits your interior decor somewhere. i think the lines blur a lot when it comes to connecting vs. consuming art, because i don’t know where it really starts or ends.
for me though, being able to connect with an artist is always ideal in the sense that i get to speak to them, know them at a personal level, look into their process, and follow their works because of the principles and values i share with them. the “pretty things” they make are an initial trigger that introduces us, but i want more than pretty things. i yearn for stories, for depth, and sometimes the buzz of art markets don’t let me do that.
(okay, maybe this might just be a rant about art markets????)
and this is where i go, “i love art markets, it’s a great gateway to getting to know your local artists”—
and as much as that is fully true, it is also fully true that i am, a little bit, tired of art markets.
in the fast-paced hyper-capitalistic society that we live in, there seems to be a shrinking space to be slow, to create slow art, to connect deeply.
taktaulah.
on connecting, then consuming art
maybe we’ve got it all wrong. i think about the times i have consumed art and it’s 99% of the time, because i’ve connected with the maker first. through some form of consumption, of course, but a lot of that initial consumption eventually cashes in.
it looks something like:
i find your art on social media > i pay attention to your everyday Stories > i’m getting interested in the person that you are and the works that you make > i make my way to one of your art booths to purchase your works
but what i see now is more like:
i go to art markets to discover artists > i consume your art by purchasing it because i am interested at first glance > i may or may not connect with you on the spot > i go home and start following you on your socials, hoping to nurture a deeper connection as i follow your journey in art
and maybe. there are no wrong ways, but i prefer the first?
taktaulah x2.
on Sam Rockwell and his reigning villain agenda.
whoever decided to cast Sam Rockwell as Wolf in this animated movie knew what they were doing.
a classic bad guy we love to hate and hate to love.
oh. back to The Bad Guys. it’s a cute movie! fun and honestly one of those super underrated animated films. animation’s gorgeous, the lines are so fun, the action sequences so well-written and executed, and the clichés lovable, actually.
10/10 would watch again.
on the return of romcoms.
there is a new romcom starring these two. it’s written by Celine Song. (i haven’t even seen Past Lives, I’M ASHAMED) but more importantly, it also stars this man.
i am elated, stoked, overjoyed, and i cannot wait to see all three of them in this romcom already. GIMME
on how wrong i was to judge a book by its cover.
(welcome to my unpopular opinion segment.)
as in, no the book wasn’t better than the cover.
it was worse.
a hundred times worse.
Brandon Sanderson has a reputation in the fantasy genre, so i’ve been curious about wanting to read one of his books but i also didn’t want to invest into a series or have to learn two million terms about the world he built. so i was incredibly attracted to this book when i saw the cover and read the first few pages:
it was also set in an Asian-ish background, although my inner alarms were going off initially because Brandon has a very white name and a very white person writing about Asian characters didn’t sit well with me at first. (i’m sorry but also NOT SORRY)
(i should have heeded my own warnings)
and because i don’t want to write much more about this book, have a list on why i thought it was so bad (my opinions. Goodreads has plenty of good reviews on this book. i don’t. i have one Very Bad Review):
it’s a body swap romance. possibly my most-hated trope.
the book’s pacing only picked up 65-70% in.
that first 65-70%? nothing happens. in the worst of ways. not in the Ghibli slice-of-life way, but in a… why am i here having to experience two teenagers’s peak awkwardness from bathing together because of their body swap situation???
i don’t like the main characters. i didn’t root for them at all.
why are the main characters in love. HOW?
so much explaining by the narrator and the characters themselves.
when the book did finally pick up, it was too late for me.
i’m just annoyed at this book and i’ve never been more annoyed by a book 😭
i was cheated by the cover, the setup, and likely the first three pages because the body swap only happened in the second or third chapter.
on sleep.
i played this on my Spotify last night with the 30-min timer on. it was a pretty good sleep. might do it again tonight.
brandon sanderson doesn't work for me either. feels like he only does Exposition and even that isn't executed well